


Hauled

by xingcamfan



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Canon, Comfort, Drama, Emotional Yifan, M/M, Sweet saint Yixing, Tao being Tao, Very supportive Luhan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-07-16 10:15:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16084043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xingcamfan/pseuds/xingcamfan
Summary: Yifan is sorry.





	Hauled

**Author's Note:**

> Authors note: This fic was written years ago and maybe you could take a good guess when. My love for FanXing was slowly going down the drain the past few months because of what has been happening between them recently. Then I saw the written draft of this fic and read it. Then I decided to rewrite it and thought that maybe this is the perfect time to share it. I never had a chance of posting it since I was never confident of how I write back then and TBH ‘til now. So I’ll just dump it here hoping that it could catch some of your attention. Let's hope for the best for FanXing!

Hauled

 

 

 

Being dragged to this place wasn’t really what he wants. Though he is not doing anything to resist it. He just let Luhan pull him through because he is stubborn that way.

When they’ve reached the entrance of the building, all Yifan wanted to do was to turn around and run to some place where he can properly breathe. But how can he when a baby-faced man has a firm grip on his arm. He never thought Luhan can be this strong.

“Don’t even think of running away now, Yifan.” He scolds him when Yifan was squirming on his hold. “ you’ve wasted enough of my time and we are here now so there is no turning back.”  
“ When I asked for your help, this was not the kind of idea that I have in mind!” The taller one shot back. “ He was mad at me Luhan. And I know that he still is.” The truth is he was wishing and hoping for the otherwise, but considering how Yixing had thrown those words in one interview, he felt a pang in his chest. He didn’t mention a name but Yifan knows that It was meant for him.

He misses Yixing so bad that his heart aches whenever he sees him on television, in his phone and in the little things that reminds him of the younger man. That’s what pushed him in wanting to clear things between them and maybe to have him back. It is not that he never tried to visit him here in his studio. In fact, he had been watching this place from afar countless times hoping that he will see Yixing. He did, though he never had the courage to face the younger man after he left a couple of years ago.

“Then why did you let me drag you here? And wasted all of my time and energy?!” Luhan runs a hand in his face in defeat. Yifan is being his giant oaf self again and emotionally and physically testing Luhan.

“... Because!” The taller man was preparing himself to retaliate but didn’t get a chance since the words got stuck in his throat when he noticed a familiar figure walking down the hall and towards them. Luhan sensed this and turned to the direction where Yifan was looking.

“Xing!” surprise at Yixing’s sudden appearance, Luhan approached him and gave him a hug. The younger returned it warmly. Yifan observed.

While he watches them interact, Yifan felt a bit out of place. It had always been like that. Even back in the days that they still belonged to one group. Whenever Luhan and Yixing were together he felt that he was poles apart from them. It hasn’t changed. In whatever circumstances they are in, it always gives him the same feeling. Although he knows for a fact that they are just best friends… Still.

Catching himself staring for too long, Yifan dropped his gazed to floor looking even more pathetic standing there.

He hears Yixing inviting Luhan for a coffee in his office and the older one agreed enthusiastically. Thinking about what he heard made him feel even more dejected and so he frowned to himself. Since he is standing a good few feet away, he thought it's a good chance to get away. But Luhan was quicker than he thought. He was caught by Luhan’s claws and once again lets himself get hauled.

Riding the elevator and walking through a long hallway until they reach Yixing’s office, to Yifan, it felt like forever. He’s been feeling uneasy because he can feel that Yixing has been looking at him. He was able to develop this kind of sixth sense whenever he was with him before. Yixing has this habit of observing other people, especially Yifan. And whenever he catches him or looks back, he sees Yixing’s sparkling eyes and smiles that brings him a very welcoming warmth. But now he is scared of looking back. Scared that he might see something else in his eyes. But what's even more frightening is seeing it empty.

Yixing proceeds to a small room to prepare their coffee when they entered his office. Luhan plopped himself on a sofa comfortably located at the center of the room while Yifan mindlessly looked around. It was his first time here after all. The room was small, but not too small for Yixing. It is a humble sized room which is perfect for him and surprisingly clean, too. Considering Yixing was not the type who tidies up every time and would always look for help in looking for some of his things that are often buried in a very messy pile of other stuff. Yifan smiled at those memories but frowns again as he observed his surroundings. Maybe some things do change.

Meanwhile, Luhan stood up from his seat and called out that he needs to excuse himself out first because he got a message from Tao that he wants to be fetched from the entrance of the building ( Tao is just being a princess and Tao is not Tao if he is not like that.). Were they having a small reunion? Luhan never mentioned to him anything about it if they do. Then, was everything happening now was planned out beforehand? Tao is even joining them any moment now.

“Wait! You can’t just leave me here?!” Yifan whispered.

Luhan pats his shoulder in comfort “I am giving you time to talk to Yixing alone.”

“So you actually planned this all along? Tao is-”

“Look Yifan,” the older sighed as he was about to step out of the room “This is actually your mess. You asked for my help and I did what I had to do. But now its time for you to do this on your own. It may seem that you are wasting my time but the way I see it, you’ve been wasting most of yours. Think about it. And at least try harder. He will understand. It's not like you don’t know Yixing.”

Although he can’t deny that Luhan has a point, he can’t help but feel a bit scared and uncertain for some reason. Yixing is known for his unending patience and kindness that he himself has encountered many times before. What scared him is, what if Yixing doesn’t have left for him anymore?

▬

Yifan took the seat where Luhan was moments ago as Yixing walks back to his receiving area a tray in hand with four cups of coffee. The younger handed him quietly a cup which he gladly but albeit hesitantly, took since he can’t wait to take a sip so that it could relax his nerves. It didn’t give him much help. The younger man sank down the sofa across him looking so calm as he took a sip from his cup. Yifan is quietly baffled by Yixing’s behavior but he understands why and kept wondering whats running on Yixing’s mind.

The humming of the air conditioner filled the room and Yifan felt that an awkward silence will ensue. He was halfway done with his coffee and its now running cold. He is as well as about to go insane since Luhan isn’t back yet ( He doesn’t have any plans on going back not until everything has been settled between him and Yixing.). Neither Yifan nor Yixing wanted to talk. The younger keeps on staring outside the window, where a little balcony was located, like he is waiting for something to appear there.

He looks so serene, peaceful and beautiful as ever. He looks even more than okay and Yifan thought that knowing this is maybe enough. Yixing might not want and need him back. And so he placed his cup back on the table thinking that he should take a leave.

“ How have you been?” Yixing was not looking at him and so he wasn’t really sure if he heard him asking him something or maybe his head was just playing tricks on him.

“...what?”

“ I was asking how you’ve been…” This time, Yixing was looking at him straight in his eyes, unwavering and gaze so soft that Yifan felt a sense of relief washing all over him.

“... good? ” Yifan nods “Good.” He repeats firmly.

That made Yixing smile “ I’m glad to hear that.” Even though it was a small response coming from him, Yifan knows that it's sincere. He can’t help but simply smile back and feel how he badly wanted to hug the younger man.

He didn’t know what exactly happened. He didn’t know how he ends up kneeling in front of Yixing, arms circling the younger man’s waist, holding him tight with his head buried at the crook of Yixing’s neck. Not even taking notice of how hard he was sobbing, wetting Yixing’s shirt with his tears and how Yixing is rubbing his hand along his back in circular motion to soothe him. He kept weeping, pouring all of his emotions out as he holds Yixing closer. Fearing that this would end soon. That Yixing will push him away not because of his rash behavior but because of what he had done in the past.

Yixing pulled himself away from him a little to wipe Yifan's tear-stained cheeks. The action so gentle and full of fondness it almost took Yifan’s breath away. Receiving this kind of affection from Yixing made his chest ache in a good way. Like it was pulling out all the longing and ruefulness that dug deep into his heart.

With his mind and eyes slowly clearing up, he noticed that Yixing is shedding some tears as well but at the same time smiling so brightly at Yifan.

“Oh, Yifan” He hushes Yifan and pulls him up from kneeling so that he could sit beside him. “Stop crying now, will you?” He chuckles while tears are still streaming down his cheeks but didn’t bother wiping them. Yifan did it for him.

Seconds, minutes have passed of a very calming silence between them after gushing all of their emotions through their tears. Holding each other's hands while looking at each other's eyes as if they are reading each other's thoughts.

Yifan then decides to speak first. “ I’m sorry.” He squeezed Yixing’s hand. There are a lot of things to say and to explain but he can’t muster up in saying them out loud to him yet.

“I know.” Yixing smiles, running his thumb over Yifan’s knuckles in a soothing manner.

“I haven’t even explained anything yet, Xing”

“You don’t really have to. I just know.”

Because of that Yifan’s eyes started to blur in tears again and so Yixing brought himself closer to the older man’s chest and hugged him so tightly, radiating all his warmth to comfort Yifan. The taller man didn’t know what he had done in his past life to receive this kind of kindness from Yixing nor what was the younger man thinking of giving this much to him. Regardless of how many times he will ask for forgiveness, he knows without a doubt that he doesn’t deserve it. Not even a drop of it. But he takes it, embraces it because it's from Yixing. His words full of fondness, his warm embrace, his scent, his touch. Oh, how he missed all of him so much.

“What's done is done, Fan. You’re here now. But…” Yixing asks reluctantly. “what took you so long?”

“I was- scared.” Yifan chokes.

Yixing pulls back looking and is surprisingly grinning at him. “ I guess things never really change” He touches Yifan’s nose playfully. “facing the consequence isn’t easy. But you did it now like a brave man you are.”

An uncertain smile etched on his face along with the lines of worry on his forehead but the older nods and hugs him once again. He figures he was forgiven so he whispers “ thank you.”

“You are always welcome, Fan.”

They stayed like for a little while longer. Comfortable in each others presence and savoring it while silence fills in. It used to be like this as well and they can’t help but fall into the same habit whenever they are together. To others, they may seem so different from each other that they could clash. They can’t deny it. However, those differences what brought them even closer and somehow what made them understand each other. It also helped them fill in the gaps that the other missed like a big missing piece in their own jigsaw puzzle.

“Xing?” Yifan called softly and the younger hummed in response. “are we-… we are still..” he hesitates for a second. “ I mean, you and I are back together… right?” He pulls away gently so he could look into Yixing’s eyes.

All Yixing did is to look back. He can’t comprehend the look that the younger one is giving him. It gives him an unsettling feeling in his stomach and it's rattling him further, he wants to look away and take back what he said. Maybe he was expecting too much from Yixing. After all, he still owes him a lot of explanation.

Without a prompt, Yixing grabs him by the collar and latches his lips onto his. It took him a while to register what exactly is happening but responded immediately. Yifan can feel every ounce of affection flowing from the younger man’s lips to his. Mouths languidly molding each other, melting away the elder’s insecurities and uncertainties and the younger replacing them by reassuring him through the movement of his lips. The younger wound his arms around the taller man’s shoulder seizing what he’s been longing for a long while. Before it could even last longer Yixing pulled back, mirth evident in his eyes and even the laugh he is holding back.

“Is something funny?” Yifan can’t help but wonder. They were having a very serious and emotional conversation a while ago and he finds it quite odd looking at Yixing about to burst into laughter.

“It's just that, I’ve been wanting to do that ever since I saw you at the lobby.” Yixing drop his head on Yifan’s shoulder as he released a fit of giggles. “I missed you so much that I don’t even care if you are going to give me a proper explanation or not. Just to hold you this close is enough.”

“You deserve it though, Xing. So much that I don’t even know where to begin. This thing between us dragged on for so long because I’ve been avoiding you.”

“But you are always there though.” Yixing ran his hand on Yifan’s nape and dragged them up to Yifan’s hair. “ I’ve seen you many times passing by the building. At first, I thought my eyes were just playing tricks on me. But then I saw you again in one of my press conference not believing it until I heard a producer saw you walking out of the hall. It happened many times but I didn’t do anything because I was waiting for you to do something.”

“I’m sorry I kept you waiting,” Yifan whispered as he draws Yixing closer. Almost making him straddle his lap. “ but we still have a lot to talk about, yeah?”

Yixing hummed in response but neither did he untangled himself from Yifan. “Let me enjoy this first a little longer.” And how can Yifan even resist that?

 

“When I said that I’m giving you time talk this was not actually what I pictured in mind.”

Both Yifan and Yixing almost jump out of their skin when they heard Luhan’s voice. However, they are still propped up in the same position, not even bothered with Luhan and Tao’s presence.

“Can’t you knock?”

“We wanted to but everything was so quiet we might interrupt something important.” Tao shrugs. He seemed to be on Luhan’s side “ And we actually did since you guys are about to get it on.”

That actually earned him a pillow to his face courtesy of Yixing who huffed and removed himself from Yifan’s lap. He settled himself instead beside the taller man who circled his arms around the younger man’s waist immediately.

“That thought didn’t even cross our minds, Zitao” Yixing argued.

“It would have if we took a lot more time of getting here.” The youngest among them countered.

Yixing can’t grasp the right words to say so he looked at Yifan thinking that maybe he can back him up. The elder just shrugged because Tao was not wrong after all. He gave Yifan an impish glare but the older was not even fazed and only chuckled to his antics. Yifan misses this side of Yixing as well.

Yifan’s purpose of confronting Yixing became a day filled with a barrage of emotions that he never thought his heart could even handle. Things that happened between them just now didn’t even cross his mind before. Talking to Yixing and apologizing to him were the only things that have been on his mind when Luhan dragged him here. He knows that nothing has been settled yet but knowing that Yixing is willing to listen to him and have him back again, he can’t ask for anything more.

Right now all he wanted to do was savor this moment with Yixing in his arms, face glowing with happiness and heart so full of unspoken words that for now only their eyes could utter.


End file.
